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What Cures Migraines?

June 27, 2008 - Wes Burns
Last night was a migraine night for your faithful blogger. To all those that suffer from regular migraines I send my deepest sympathies. To those that have no idea what migraines are like I offer this simple test: place your head in a bucket of ice water, then a bucket of warm water, then underneath the moving tire of a large tractor/trailer. Feels something like that.

I understand that, other than my west coast Strangers, many of you may have already left work and headed back to your homes for a weekend of reading and sober reflection on your life. For that I apologize. About the "not having the blog up for a little at-work-distraction", not the "my weekends are filled with sober reflection and I feel I might secretly have skipped 26 and moved directly to 55". I cannot help you with that.

What I can share for you is some brief tidbits of information (at one point called "Factoids" in the buzzword 90's) brought to you by the definitive source of fact and reason: the Internet.

THEY STILL MAKE CRACKED MAGAZINE. I haven't seen a paper issue of Cracked since eyeballing an old copy at my uncle's house some fifteen years ago. Recently I was perusing the internet and came across This is what technology has given us: the ability to maintain a failing publication despite the fact that Cracked's greatest praise was to be like Mad magazine, just not as highbrow.

MIKE ROWE USED TO BE ON QVC. If you don't know who Mike Rowe is you're wrong, you do know who he is and you just don't know it. Mike Rowe is Mr. Discovery channel. He hosts Dirty Jobs, The Deadliest Catch, and a whole slew of forgettable specials and documentaries about walrus or something along those lines. He also got his start selling...items...on late night QVC. If you have never watched a man so clearly hate his job, on camera, go to youtube and watch. Hilarious. Speaking of which...

SOME PEOPLE CAN'T SPELL YOUTUBE. One of my less than tech savy friends explained some months ago he hated looking for videos on youtube because he couldn't find anything. I asked him a few questions about exactly how can someone screw up typing into a search engine and he, angry that I did no believe his claims that youtube was in fact not really a video website, showed me the page on his computer. He was right. The page he was looking up had no videos, no comment board, no suggestions from others. However it did have plenty of PVC tubing to purchase.

I laughed and laughed. How foolish! No other person could make such an obvious and naive mistake. Turns out quite a few people cannot seem to get the spelling straight. Maybe my friend wasn't being ridiculous, or maybe there are just a host of others like him out there. Good lord I hope not.

I hope that these internet quips will keep you sated over the weekend. As for me I hope that no other migraine's occur this weekend and that one day I will grow an extra set of arms. Those two wishes are not related, but equally important.


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