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An open letter to giant inflatable lawn decorations

October 21, 2012
By KELLY VAN DE WALLE (vandkel@hotmail.com) , Times-Republican

My stance on giant inflatable lawn decorations is no secret. For years I've said they are only acceptable if you live in a giant, inflatable house and are, yourself, are a giant inflatable humanoid. If you have one - or worse, multiple ones - and invite me over, you are accepting a non-verbal agreement that allows me to poke you random times with various sharp things to A) check to see if you're inflatable and B) act as subtle punishment for your bad judgment.

 
 

 

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