For years, the good people behind the candy M&Ms have touted their product as one of the cleanest to eat in the entire sweets market.
"Melt in your mouth, not in your hand," has been a tagline synonymous with the candy.
Well, as they tout this clean way of getting a sugar fix, let me remind them it's not always clean, especially when a 2-year-old munches on them.
Just last week, I gave him an M&M and a few seconds later there was brown liquid on his chin right below his mouth. That didn't seem very clean to me and it kind of grossed out his mother.
But it gets even worse.
M&Ms are rewards for a job well done on the potty, which has made bedtime activities a little more challenging.
At one point he went from the potty to the bath and we thought he took care of the M&M in his mouth.
Well, later we look in the tub and saw that something brown was floating in it. We expected the worse and thought we'd have to drain the tub faster than Green Castle Lake, but eventually figured out the foreign brown substance was a portion of the M&M and not an accident. Something about seeing that floating thing in the tub made Mom say that it was definitely Dad's job (mine) to fish that out.
Maybe we just have bad timing with the candy as some nights he goes from the potty to getting his teeth brushed. Then we look afterwards and there is still some piece of M&M hiding in his mouth.
"The dentist is going to kill us," his mother can be heard saying when this happens.
I guess it would be easier to keep him away from the candy, if they weren't so darn tasty and convenient to travel with. It's like instant silence for a whining kid to pop one of those in their mouth.
I'm just letting those good people, the makers of M&Ms, know that it's not ALL clean when it comes to their candy.
I have 2-year-old who can attest to that.
Now let me go get another wet paper towel...again.
Reporter Andrew Potter is a Tuesday columnist for the Times-Republican. The views expressed in this column are personal views of the writer and don't necessarily reflect the views of the T-R. Contact Andrew Potter at 641-753-6611 or firstname.lastname@example.org